Monday, May 27, 2024

Marriage and the Threats that Can Destroy It.

September 20, 2017 by  
Filed under News, Opinion, Relationship Talk, Weekly Columns

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( There are fewer things more precious in life than finding the one with whom you want to spend the rest of your days. It’s a feat that not many people successfully accomplish during their time on this earth, but for those that do, they understand how wonderful it is to be in that group of individuals that get it.

While having a lifelong love is the pursuit of most people, that doesn’t mean that the process is without its ups and downs. There are things that people go through that others could not imagine having to deal with in their marriage. It doesn’t mean that one situation is necessarily better than the other; it just means that people are different and to each its own what they allow, forgive and are able to live with.

As such, sometimes there are signs or threats that are clear indications that something may not be right. I am not saying look for them, but when or if they pop up, it would behoove you to not ignore them.

So here are some typical (and maybe not so typical) threats that can hurt and or destroy your happily wedded bliss.

Money Issues

This is the number one reason for divorce in America. If there are issues with money, whether it is too much spending or not enough coming in, it can threaten the peace of your home. Don’t let things boil over; talk about the issues, because this kind of threat can breed resentment. When it all comes full circle, there can be a messy blow up that can end everything you’ve worked hard to build.

Unrealistic Expectations

It is good to have expectations because they are a measure by which you determine your spouse’s compatibility. But sometimes, having unrealistic ones, or un-discussed expectations can kill your marriage. It is both unfair and unwise to go into a relationship without any idea of what the other wants. Going years in this way can drive an unfixable wedge between you and your mate.

Lack of Intimacy

This is a big one of course. Some people don’t want to pry so they may ignore it, thinking that their mate is just going through something. However, more times than not, there is something more sinister at play. That sinister thing is more than likely infidelity. If you are experiencing a lack of intimacy (sex, quality time together, etc.), have the conversation because it may be that your spouse has been in an emotional relationship with someone else and hasn’t gone all the way yet. Regardless, this red flag is never one to dismiss because I guarantee you there is something else at play there.

The Internet

It may sound silly but there is too much happening on the Internet for things to be 100% innocent. From porn addictions to hooking up, if your mate is spending crazy amounts of time online and on social media, it’s a threat. This kind of behavior can cut off communication, which is a key in healthy relationships. As the saying goes, if you see something, say something.

Marriage is hard work. But due diligence is a great protector of the world you’ve built.

Staff Writer; Rasheda Abdullah

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