Tuesday, March 19, 2024


Beginner’s Guide to Life After the Engagement Is Called OFF.

March 20, 2019 by  
Filed under News, Opinion, Relationship Talk, Weekly Columns

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(ThySistas.com) Pick your head up, it is literally going to be okay.  Their lost not yours and thank God things ended before you walked down that aisle and spent thousands of dollars on a huge wedding.  I know you may can’t see it now, but you’ll be back to dating and happy again when you’re ready.

I remember trying to get over my engagement being called off as I had my bridesmaid dresses picked out, my ex and I had visited several venues together, I had my iPad filled with the wedding details and notes, decided on my 150 guests and begun almost saying “Yes to the Dress” and then……he left.

There were no warnings at the time and I tried to understand how could he just up and leave everything that we had built together?  I cried for days upon days.  I didn’t post anything on social media for a while, I never even talked about the breakup until about a year and half later.  I just kept living my life day by day and moment by moment to get over what was supposed to be a lifetime of happiness together, to me being single from another failed relationship, again.

At the time, I was a playwright.  So I took that pain and turned it into a play and it was a sold out show.  But you may not want to heal from your called engagement with curtain call and standing ovation.  So I have provided for you, a few things that I learned to help you get on with your life, after your engagement has been called off.

Deal with the pain or feelings of embarrassment:  You can’t go around this step, sorry.  Take the time that you need to cry, write in your journal, hide out for a few days, call in sick or whatever you need to do to take care of YOU.  The world can wait, your mental health can’t.

Let your immediate family and the bridal party know immediately:  If you have been in full swing of wedding planning, let your family and bridal party know so that more money won’t be wasted purchasing things for the wedding.  You don’t have to discuss the details of the engagement being called off until you’re ready to so.

Return back to work and other daily activities:  The wedding may not be going forward but you must go forward with your life.  Just as with any other breakup, you eventually have to pick up the pieces that’s left in your life and move on.  Your ex-finance I’m sure, is not sitting around sobbing uncontrollably or starving themselves, so why should you?

Staff Writer; Felicia T. Simpson

One may also connect with this sister online over at; FTSimpson.com.


Comments

4 Responses to “Beginner’s Guide to Life After the Engagement Is Called OFF.”
  1. Julie says:

    Great article!

    People worldwide need to stop pressuring women to get married… and make them feel they are nothing if they do not find the right partner, if they do not have children and so on.

    Too many women ended up with the wrong partner because of social pressure. Women do not have to feel and be devalued if they are not married. Men never had this kind of pressure and it is about time that females can have the same freedom to create her life on her own terms! There is not one way for us to be happy!!!!

  2. Julie says:

    The staff of thysistas.com is unbelievable! In my last comment I added the link of the great book of Marshawn Evans and you removed it! Shame on you!!! Her book entitled Believe Bigger can empower many Black women worldwide!

  3. ThySista says:

    You can re-add your link Julie…

    Note: Have had a problem with SPAMMERS…

    Sorry about that…

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