No One is Ever Enough.
August 8, 2019 by ThySista
Filed under News, Opinion, Relationship Talk, Weekly Columns
(ThySistas.com) When we are honest there are many of us still praying for Mr. Right. As we move into a space of embracing self, many women are starting to re-evaluate the standards they have for a relationship. They want better for themselves and need to be with someone that fulfills them in a way they know without a doubt they are not settling for less than they deserve. No more compromising on getting part of the list of things you need in a man…you want it all. There is nothing wrong with this as long as you are willing to offer the same level of care you require. The problem seems to be some sistahs have decided what they need is perfection. You know that thing no man can achieve, nor can they. Sitting in a room with sistahs discussing what they demand in a relationship led some of us to realize there are some sistahs for which no one will ever be enough for them. They feel they need, and want to be married, but what truly stands in their way is the need for perfection.
It is important to acknowledge the hurt you have endured in past relationships. Its even more important to understand the scars you still carry, and how that effects the way you view relationship going further. Some sistahs have serious trust issues, and that has nothing to do with where they are it’s the product of where they have been. They are compassionate people until something goes wrong. If the man is late for a date, they feel trust is unattainable. If he forgets to call or text one time, he is unreliable. If he has a bad day and needs to talk to you later so that he can tend to his self-care, and this is communicated, he’s shutting you out. 
If he were to hold you to this level of expectation, he’s not accepting of you as you are. He doesn’t realize you aren’t perfect, but you love well. You deserve to be seen for who you are, and not through the eyes of what he’s been through with other women. Sistahs, do you see the double standard in this? We can’t say we want to be loved but are so guarded that no one is enough.
No one is saying accept being treating in a sub-par manner, but it is very important to be reasonable. Allowing one’s experience to make a heart of stone is very unfortunate. You don’t want to be judged for every little thing; no one wants to be picked apart. Well, neither does a man that is genuinely interested in you. He knows he’s not perfect…but neither are you. That is very important to remember if you are ever to find peace and happiness in a relationship. People, you included, will make mistakes. The issue is in learning from them and going forward. You don’t want the mistakes you make to be constantly thrown in your face…neither does he.
If everything a man does is wrong no matter how hard he tries to make you happy, and you maintain a double standard you can very well run off your Mr. Right. If that happens it won’t be a cause of no one wanting to love you as much as you not allowing yourself to be loved. In some instances, the brother is not intimidates by who we are, we are simply unreasonable because nothing is ever enough.
Staff Writer; Chelle’ St James
May also connect with this sister via Twitter; ChelleStJames.
