Sunday, June 16, 2024

Anxiety is Not a License to Do Harm.

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( Anxiety disorder is real, and there are millions of people living with it. Some are managing medically, and there are many that have no diagnosis but have all the symptoms. It is important that we have understanding and compassion for our sisters struggling with anxiety. Some of them live every waking moment in fear, and many desire to get better but struggle with how to do so. Having a loved one that has anxiety disorder requires patience. It’s important to know they aren’t trying to be negative, and they don’t want to be afraid. They need to be able to talk to sisters in their community, and receive support verses ridicule. They are not outcasts…they are our sisters, and they need us to be there for, and with them.

The problem lies with those that would dare use anxiety as a method to harm others. It is despicable to use a real illness as a way to inflict verbal, and even physical damage on others. its’s not a tool for manipulation so that you may always have your way, and woe is it unto those that stand up to tell you that the behavior is wrong. Sisters that use anxiety for these purposes make it hard for those that are actually battling with the illness. Every anxiety attack doesn’t cause you to throw objects at someone, and every trigger is not someone not doing what you want them to do the way you want it done. This behavior is abusive, and in some cases narcissistic.

Some people that have loved ones with anxiety disorder research the illness and go to appointments with them, so they can better understand how to be supportive. If they are taking the time to learn…they may be able to discern real from fake. It is unfortunate when someone with deep anxiety calls out someone for not being genuine in their claim. Don’t use a known illness to deceive and harm others.

Lastly, there are those of us (myself included), that truly suffer from anxiety disorder that have to try to care about our support system. It may be hard, but you know you lashed out during an anxiety attack and hurt someone that love you and was just trying to help…apologize. Its’s not their fault you are battling with anxiety disorder just like it’s not your fault. However, they love you regardless of the disorder. Just because they understand doesn’t mean being the ill placed object of your anger won’t hurt. They may take the abuse because they know you are hurting, and battling with a disorder, but it’s okay to care about their feelings. It is a known fact that the people closest to you will often bare the brunt of your frustration with said disorder. Spouses, children, friends and family usually end up taking the heat. The don’t do so because you are a burden…they are with you because they love you. Don’t forget to love them back.

I had to learn how hurtful my words could be during an anxiety attack depending on the trigger. I realized my best friend who, as an only child, was the only sister I ever had was sinking into depression in part because I berated her so often when dealing with my anxiety. I was pushing away the one person I knew loved me that I could truth. Though I acknowledge my anxiety disorder she didn’t deserve to be treated that way. I had to realize its not all about me, and that I’m not the only person in life going thorough pain. I’ve learned how to better manage my condition, and I take the time to appreciate my sister. I actively love on her, and uplift her…regardless of how I’m feeling. I will never forget that as she was experiencing loss…I wasn’t there for her because all I could see was my anxiety. She never left me alone, and I won’t allow her to alone ever again as long as I’m here.

One way to manage anxiety is trying to get out of your own head. Putting your focus on the people around you, and the positive energy they are pouring into you may actually help you deal with the disorder.

Staff Writer; Chelle’ St James

May also connect with this sister via Twitter; ChelleStJames.

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