Friday, December 8, 2023

Sometimes Even the Loyal Must Let Go.

September 7, 2016 by  
Filed under News, Opinion, Relationship Talk, Sista Talk, Weekly Columns

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( It is known that life has its challenges, and sometimes it seems that when we are trying to get up life tends to throw more curve balls. It’s a blessing to know we have those sistahs in our life that will stand by our side. It is a wonderful feeling when you are able to be the person that is there for a friend. When we are able to flow positive energy into another we put goodness into the universe. This kind of energy always tends to find us again when we need it most. When we are the loyal friend we go to great lengths to be there for those in our sistah circle, but we must also know when to let go.

Sometimes we have that friend that has been with us a long time, but is addicted to pain and suffering. Loyalty is a positive character trait but, like anything, if we are not wise it can be used against us. 123african-american-women-talkingWhen we stand in the gap a lot is pulled from us. It takes energy, and patience to be there for another. It is unfortunate when the person is so caught up into feelings, and emotions, that they become hurtful. Loyalty does not mean allow abuse to take place because you don’t want to leave the person you care about. There comes a time when we must access the people in our life to determine if they are wholesome or toxic.

Certain kinds of pain may be entirely too deep to assist with because the person hurting is unwilling to do what’s necessary to unburden themselves. When you find yourself giving the same answers to the same situations…it may be time to go. When you find yourself on the receiving of rants and they lash out at you constantly…it may be time to let go. When it becomes offensive to speak truth to life no matter how you say if…it may be time to let go. The important thing is to remember you can only help an individual to the degree they are willing to help themselves.

Words are powerful; they can heal and injure. When you make time for your loved one despite your schedule, and they begin to show you a selfishness that disregards you completely you may need to redefine the nature of that relationship. It’s never easy, but for your wellbeing it is necessary. If you are not careful you will kind that you are constantly down, and your positivity is tainted. This is the result of dwelling among toxic behavior over time. It’s not wrong to want to be there for our friends, but it is not abandonment when they mistreat you and you have to leave.

When they see you as “everybody”, and no matter how loyal you are to them they associate you with negative feelings you have to accept what they have allowed. No amount of loyalty is work you destroying your peace and balance. It’s vital to your emotional, and mental, stability to know when to let go. Of course your friend may get upset, and accuse you of abandonment. However, you are not a garbage can, and true friends are not selfish. Let toxic go, and live.

Staff Writer; Christian Starr

May connect with this sister over at Facebook and also Twitter


One Response to “Sometimes Even the Loyal Must Let Go.”
  1. Latasha M. says:

    Nothing stays the same forever. That even happens with friends.

    “LET GO” is my motto.

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