Sunday, August 9, 2020


Complaining Can Kill You.

December 12, 2019 by  
Filed under Health & Wellness, News, Opinion, Weekly Columns

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(ThySistas.com) We all know that sister that has a groan every day, and twice on Sunday. Its hard to have a conversation with her because everything out of her mouth is negative. If you offer positivity it is shot down or viewed as dismissing her feelings. Sometimes it can be hard to understand how one can complain even in the presence of their blessings. You’d think the new job, promotion, new house, new car, or a blossoming new relationship would cause some level of joy. It’s a shock when your sister friend dismisses all of this goodness to grip about anything she can find. She is always going through a physical challenge from her cycle to the cold she can’t get rid of while remaining in a perpetual state of tired.

There is no consoling this friend, and in that state, she truly believes what she faces trumps any challenge that arrives in your life. This sister will make what you are dealing with a talking point in why her life is so messed up. You might find over time as you interact with her that how you see your life is shifting. Well, complaining can rub off on you, and its dangerous.

What sister friend doesn’t understand is her perpetual state of complaining could have a direct effect on her health. One can’t expect to be well while dealing in negativity on a constant basis. Granted you might not be able to get your friend to see reason, and acknowledge the positive that is apparent in her life, but you do have a hand in what you will do regarding how you will speak about your life. constant exposure to negativity is toxic, but it’s a toxic that takes root slowly so you might not notice the change. You can move from seeing, and celebrating, the positivity in your life to finding something to complain about even if things are well. You might find that your blood pressure is up regularly, you are tired all the time, and there might be headaches you aren’t used to experiencing.

In addition to the previously mentioned…you might find that you are finding reasons to fight with family and your significant other about petty matters. They will notice the change, in some cases, before you and when it is mentioned in an attempt to help you might find yourself lashing out at them the way your friend lashes out at you. In this space the toxic behavior of your friend has become apart of your life, and you still can’t discuss what happening to you with her because nothing you could face is more important than her woes.

Sister, take your life back while it’s in your power to do so. You may need to put your relationship with sister toxic on pause so that you can re-center yourself. Allow those around you that love you to pour positivity into you. When you feel yourself attempting to discredit the positivity they are sharing say something positive on purpose. Avoid the stroke, heart attack, and migraines by laying that negative energy down. Once you’ve gotten the positivity back and you are balanced you will have to re-evaluate the nature of your friendship if it still exists. It is important that you ask yourself the hard questions about what both of you bring to the table, and the reciprocity in the friendship…or lack thereof.  If she is not willing to operate in a better space you might have to love her from a distance, because no one is worth your peace.

Staff Writer; Chelle’ St James

May also connect with this sister via Twitter; ChelleStJames.


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