Saturday, May 25, 2024

Breaking Up is Hard to do: Getting Over an Ex.

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( It is a hard thing to put oneself out there only to be heartbroken in the end. The time, effort, and commitment a person gives are some of the greatest assets they have. To see it all die because a relationships didn’t workout is devastating to say the least.

Experts have said that a failed relationship/marriage stir up emotions similar to that of losing a loved one. In essence, it is the end of something and depending on how deeply involved you are, how long it lasted and other circumstances, it can feel like mourning the dead.

For this reason, many people choose not to get involved with someone, even if they like them, because the thought of it not working out outweighs the good that could come from it. I understand that notion completely. That was me in my twenties. But at some point, for those of us who took the leap and decided to be “all in,” we know the risks. And if that person ends up being in our lives for only a season, the process of getting over them can be unbearable.

So for those who know how it feels to love and loss and or are trying hard to move on, here are some things that can help you get over your breakup.

Stay Away

The first thing you want to do is get rid of all connections with this person. This means delete and block their numbers. Delete and block them on all social media. Delete text messages. The main goal is to cut off all channels of possible communication with that person. Out of sight out of mind is the idea here.

Log Off

If you are an avid social media user, it may be a good idea to take a break. Sometimes you are friends with people who are still friends with your ex and if they like a picture, or comment on his or her posts, you can see it and it can trigger you.

Get Out
It can be lonely after a breakup, especially if you lived with your ex. You want to make sure you have people around you that will support you so spending time with friends and loved ones will help you tremendously.

Let it Go

Memories can haunt you so you want to throw out anything that will remind you fo this person. This can be clothes, gifts, and pictures. We are emotional creatures and with something so heavy as the dissolution of a relationship, the slightest thing can cause a relapse. You may fight the thought of letting go of EVERYTHING at first, but you will be thankful in the end.

Seek Help

The grief from a failed relationship can be so overwhelming that therapy is needed. This is perfectly fine and you should never be ashamed of getting the help you need to move on with your life. Whether it be seeing a professional or even joining a support group, if it gets to the point where things seem unbearable, this may be an effective route for you to take.

It will take some time, but know that you can do it. Take it one day at a time and you will be healed before you know it.

Staff Writer; Rasheda Abdullah

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