Friday, December 8, 2023

Give the Grace You Demand of Others.

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( Grace and mercy are necessities in this life. We might not recognize these to aspects on a daily basis, but they exist. Far too often grace is misunderstood so it can be seen as a blessing we are receiving because of something we are doing right. Sometimes we see grace a thing we ae entitled to for many reasons. However, the problem enters when we don’t see others as deserving of this same measure of grace. It is fair to say the same can be applied to attention, patience, understanding, and compassion. It is very important that we are aware of what is going on around us because if not careful we’ll have an expectation of others that we can’t meet. I remember moving slow, feeling a bit insecure due to my physical scars, and having spells whereby I cried a bit.

The truth is I lost a lot, and had endured great horrors. Because I knew pain, I poured all the love and support I had in me to those that were a part of my community. I knew my condition required grace, and as I was learning how to live with illness, I also needed mercy. I could never imagine not giving the same margins of error I need as I make mistakes everyday. This very acknowledgement of truth allows me to give the grace my state demands.


This double standard ruins relationships of all kinds and causes us to lose people that truly love us. No one is perfect…that includes you. You will have bad days, challenges, make dad choices, and mistakes.

There will be days it will be on you to apologize for your behavior. The grace comes in when we aren’t our best person and the people around us extend us the grace needed to get to a better place. There are times they will help us out of situations without exposing our shame. They may give us that dosage of truth with a compassionate hand verses being as blunt as possible. We owe it to ourselves to give this care to other. Let’s be honest if we always received what we deserve we might breakdown quicker.

Moment of truth, it’s time to give grace you demand. Just as you know the moment is about you when you’re going through…the same can be said of others. You will have people in your community that have experienced loss, they are hurting, they might go through illness, natural disasters, and varying degrees of trauma. When it happens, they will need you to be there for them. They will need you to see them in the same manner you want to be seen when it’s you. They will need you to give them an ear and a shoulder. They will need to genuinely hear what’s on their mind and heart. It will be important for you to give them the truth with care, and give them the same grace for their mistakes.

Between a situation, life, and guilt they could be beating themselves up enough. They need someone to be, and offer, genuine support judgement. I understand that it is never a good practice condone negative practices, or act as a crutch. However, you should give the same margin of error you received. If you find this difficult, think back to the time the person in a jam was you. Think about the care and concern given you…and give what you’ve come to expect. This is a necessary component of community, relationship, and sisterhood building. There has to be a return to reciprocity.

Staff Writer; Chelle’ St James

May also connect with this sister via Twitter; ChelleStJames.

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