(ThySistas.com) Sisters what are we, that are in relationships, doing? When the person we trusted to be in a committed relationship steps outside of such there is a deep pain and feeling of betrayal that is often very valid. There are some of us that will pause for a moment and think over the events of the relationship. If you haven’t been abusing your partner in any way the anger is heightened. If you honestly look at self and find that you have been abusive, and toxic, you know they are still wrong for their actions you just know they aren’t along in the wrong column. However, the pain of the cheating is still present. You have every right to address the offense that has been committed against you. With that being said, it’s time we finally begin to confront how that offense is dealt with. The action of cheating causes enough pain; why should we add to it with our actions or let him off the hook by not acknowledging his responsibility.
If your man, or partner cheats, its high time we stop going after the side chick. The person your partner is cheating with is not in a relationship with you. Addressing the other person only makes sense if that person knows you, and knows you are in a relationship with your partner. Even when this is the case your partner should bare the largest part of the responsibility as it was their job to stand with you to respect the relationship. This is important because far too often women end up fighting women while justifying the behavior of the cheater. Please know that if your significant other is a woman the same rules should apply. The difference in treatment in these situations is another matter entirely but know that you should definitely keep the same energy.
Violating your trust, and the relationship, is not something that should be okay no matter who does it. It cannot be reiterated enough; it is your partners job to uphold the relationship. In some cases, the woman you are ready to fight could feel the same way about you…as she thought you were the side chick. In this instance the women should stand together as both have been betrayed.
On the subject of fighting…how many more situations will we watch whereby cheating leads to a physical fight in public. The pain of the offense is deeply understandable but are you ready to go to jail. Assault is what you are looking at if you choose to fight this woman, and assault is what you are looking at if you choose to fight your partner. No, it won’t seem fair in that moment, but that woman did not put her hands on you, so you aren’t legally justified in laying a hand on her. Legally you aren’t justified in beating on him either though its how you feel. If the roles were reverses no one would care that you cheated on him…only that he beat on you and was wrong in doing so regardless of his feelings. All of this has to be taken into consideration when you decide you are going to fight either party in this messed up situation.
Sisters we have to stop coming for each other’s necks in spaces where it is not warranted. We can’t fight for women standing together when we are not willing to deal with each other properly. If you partner violated your trust hold them accountable, not the person that was turned into a side chick that had no idea you existed. Furthermore, if she does know deal with her apart from him. She violated your trust on a personal level and ought to stand accountable for such. In either space the partner has to be liable for the violation of your relationship because only the people involved can open the door for it to be damaged in this way. It’s time out for wasting energy on fighting the side chick.
Staff Writer; Christian Starr
May connect with this sister over at Facebook; https://www.facebook.com/christian.pierre.9809 and also Twitter; http://twitter.com/MrzZeta.