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Secret Confessions of a Childless Rebel.

October 5, 2018 by  
Filed under Health & Wellness, News, Opinion, Weekly Columns

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( Where is it written that all women are destined to have kids? Is this a foregone conclusion, or the pompous attitude of a society that believes a woman isn’t complete until she gives birth?

I’ve tried babysitting, and I’ve tried chaperoning my cousins, all seven at once. And as a result I discovered that kids and Peggy don’t mix. Coming from a small family where I was an only child, everyone assumed that I would get married and have a house full of kids.

Luckily, I  was persuaded  from hitching a ride aboard the Wedding Train  Battalion, which I have never regretted. As for children, I’m all for having them, as long as they’re someone else’s.

When I was 30, I was told that my fertility clock was in the final stages of decline, and within a year all my eggs would shrivel up. Heck, I was so busy writing the next “great novel,” the last thing on my mind was shrunken eggs.

Several family members who shall remain anonymous, told me umpteenth times, that women were put on earth for one reason, to give birth. Does that mean every time a woman has sex, she does it for the sole purpose of having a child? I don’t know about other women, but the ones I associate with, make love for the thrill  and excitement. So there!

Women are noted for their maternal instincts. Thus, society assumes that motherhood is at the core of our thought mechanism. So, it’s only natural when I tell people I don’t have kids, they accuse me of being selfish to the point of hypocrisy.

To liven up the debate, I ask them, “Are you telling me I should let society dictate how I live my life?” This causes them to respond with a nervous laugh, followed by, “No, that’s not what I’m saying.

As the argument continues, I tell them there are millions of women who have kids, but can’t afford to give the child all the things he or she needs. So, why should I take it upon myself to adhere to a role I don’t want or need? At this point, the conversation ends, and the angry, busy body walks away, mumbling words I’ve yet to understand.

For the sake of argument where is it written that I must succumb to the whims of society and give birth? It’s ironic that the women who tell me how selfish I am,  receive minimal support from the kids’ fathers What’s great about that?  What’s great about “tracking” down your spouse or  significant other so they can give you money to purchase a 12.4-ounce container of Similac Advanced Baby Formula Powder for $94.79?  Can anyone say, no answers available

According to the U.S. Census Bureau, the percentage of women able to have children but chose not to, increased from 46.5 percent in 2012 to 47.6 percent in 2014. Not a huge number by any stretch, but the increase gives credence to the fact, childless by choice is becoming more acceptable.

In writing what I consider newsworthy as it relates to life experiences, this commentary is based on my child-free escapades of the late 1990s. As of today, I have never had any regrets about the choice I made. And for people who insist I will never know the pleasure of having grandchildren. I tell them, if  I want to see a 10-year-old interact with Nana and Pawpaw, I can log onto YouTube and see hundreds of grandkids/grandparents videos. But why would I do that when the world with all its intrigue and excitement is waiting for me? Next!

Staff Writer; Peggy S. Butler

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