(ThySistas.com) I don’t know about you, but I have a lot of friends. I meet people and I fall in love with them and I draw them close to me. I have always been like this. I guess it’s just my Pisces nature. As such, I’ve learned a thing or two about being a friend and how to deal with various personalities and backgrounds.
Something I’ve dealt with lately is conflict within one of my friendships. A friend of mine, who is has a very strong personality, and I disagreed on where we should go for our girls trip this summer. Things go heated. It also didn’t help that Mercury was in retrograde, which is a planetary occurrence that can wreak havoc on communication, amongst other things. Through this situation, it became overwhelmingly clear to me that there is a need to be more aware of how I deal with conflict that occurs within a friendship.
Here are some ways to handle such issues.
Consider Outside Forces
Things like Mercury Retrograde or situations with other close individuals can leave you in your feelings, skew your judgment, and affect your reactions. When dealing with conflict, it’s important to examine why you feel so strongly about the situation and use that as a gauge to determine if what you’re feeling is valid. In my case, my friend and I spoke three days into the most recent Mercury Retrograde and didn’t speak again until two days before it was over. Mercury Retrograde lasts 3 weeks.
Take a Break
You will find in dealing with conflict that it may be wise to take a break. Walk away from the situation. Put some distance and time between you, your friend, and the conflict you have. That’s what I had to do in my situation and it really helped because you don’t want to end up saying something you regret.
Talk it Out
After all parties involved have cooled down, it’s a good idea to talk it out. You don’t want to move forward with unresolved or un-communicated feelings. This will only cause issues down the road as it can breed resentment. You don’t want that. It may be good to have a neutral party present that can be a sounding board for everyone involved. It helps to calm things and, hopefully, bring clarity to the situation.
Be the Bigger Person
This is something that some folks may have a hard time doing. If I’m being honest, it’s not always easy for me, but in my most recent case of friendship conflict, that’s what I did. I wanted to go on a cruise, she wanted to go to a destination. I ultimately gave in and needless to say, we’re going to Jamaica!
Dealing with conflict is really never fun but you have to understand that it is inevitable. There will come a time when you have to address something that has transpired between you and a friend. These are just a few tips to help you get through it with your friendship still intact.
Staff Writer; Rasheda Abdullah