Monday, May 27, 2024

Did You Say Queen.

October 26, 2017 by  
Filed under News, Opinion, Sista Talk, Weekly Columns

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( As a black woman, I truly believe God made no race of women stronger. My perspective does not stop me from appreciating women of other races, and ethnicities. However, I choose to acknowledge the strength, grace, beauty, and mystical nature that is black women. With that being stressed there is something sisters we must discuss, and that is the ideal of Queen…or Queendom. It’s time we have a heart to heart about it before we destroy thrones that we are meant to inherit. If we are bluntly honest we know every sister is NOT a Queen.

Queendom is more than being just a strong black woman. That title is not simply for women with degrees, wealthy bank account, nor wives. It is not for the indecisive, nor for those that refuse to move past the roadblocks in their life. We must understand to be a Queen requires a sister to be above the may lay, and she must be willing to stand above reproach. To make the best decisions in the situations she finds herself faced with, and she must be willing to sacrifice for what she believes in.

So many of our sisters are running with the logic respect me because I’m a Black Queen, and they are literally admonishing and demanding black men honor their Queendom. I love the self-esteem, and the positive affirmation over one’s life, but you must do more than that. Sisters you must first believe in your own Queendom, and in doing so it will require to set some order to your realm. “Every Queen isn’t the same”. That is true when it comes to preference and individuality…not principle. If your realm is not to fall to confusion and disarray there must be order, standards and boundaries. Sound decisions will not come from a mental space riddled in confusions and contradictions. Believe me there are men that need to evaluate the usage of King for these same principle reasons when it comes to leadership, but that’s for a men’s meeting. If you don’t respect your own Queendom, you can’t get angry with black men for not respecting, or acknowledging, what they can’t see…or what they view as a walking contradiction.

Queens are treated with the utmost respect regardless of their individualities. Things are done for them not because they aren’t strong enough to do for themselves, but simply because it is an honor to serve them. We need to understand this when we allow white women to use our energy and essence for their feminist fight. I have seen sisters stand in a crowded room and when a brother takes notice, and offers her his seat she accuses him of objectifying her. I’ve seen men hold open the door only to be told “I can do that for myself”. Well, sisters are you Queen or commoner? That is one you truly need to mediate on. Men will want to serve you, and treat you according to your mantle if you insist on being a Queen…that does not make you less of a woman. Make up your mind. Know that just as the nature of black and white women are different…so shall our embodiments be of constitutes the very nature of a Queen.

Whether you are a Queen choosing to stand alone…or one awaiting a King you must implement standards. It’s quite easy to have standards for the man, but it would be wise if you start with self. How you carry yourself, handle your business, the amount of integrity you have, how much truth you live in, your standard of loyalty, and implementation of order will scream who and what you are before the man ever arrives. Yes, some women will hate, but there will be some that desire to understand your nature as a Queen when the above-mentioned flow in a positive energy. None of us are perfect, but Queens aren’t such because they call it. This is the very nature of their being, and they must earn that aura.

Queens are the epitome of grace, mystic, manner, control, accountability, and continued growth. Her path isn’t perfect but she grows from mistakes, and she masters challenges. Queendom doesn’t mean she deals with foolishness from others; it’s quite the opposite as Queens are not to be trifled with. She is not insecure in the strength of her womanhood, so a man catering to her very existence doesn’t make her feel objectified nor belittled. She is graceful in recognizing when she is being honored. When Queens are walking even the brothers that aren’t Kings take notice, and they are strengthened by her presence though they aren’t worthy of her. Sisters you must decide because you can’t be ratchet, drama filled, indecisive, void of accountability, and addicted to insecurity while screaming respect my Queendom.

Everything comes with a price, and to be Queen is to face your past, pain, hurt, and challenges head on. It is to evolve from that previous place, and you must be in control of, and accountable to, yourself. Queens exude order…they don’t repel such. If you claim to be a Queen don’t just say it…please walk in it. Our people are in dire need of the Queens. We need the healing and magic only they can wield. Furthermore, the over saturation of the use of the title without its energy threatens to diminish the respect it invokes. If you can’t handle the weight of the crown there is no shame in such. All a Queen will ask is that you purpose to earn it, or please put it down.

Staff Writer; Chelle’ St James

May also connect with this sister via Twitter; ChelleStJames.


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