(ThySistas.com) The idea that our significant other may be being unfaithful is one of the most harrowing experiences we can have day-to-day. The emotions that it stirs up: doubt, fear, regret among many others. Most of all, the uncertainty and the way it leads you to question everything make life miserable – and it eats away at you and your relationship.
Much of the time this concern will be unfounded, misread signals leading to two and two making five. However, the fact is that sometimes people do stray – and if the confirmation only comes when they are telling you then it can be all the more numbing. Rather than having doubts keep you awake all night, it’s worth knowing once and for all.
Taking some proactive steps can make a difference. When you know the truth, for better or worse, you can put things behind you and move on.
Ask Them What’s Wrong
Often, the sense that a partner is hiding infidelity from us can come from changes in their behaviour. They become more distant, irrationally angry or irritable. Sometimes, they’ll become insulting because they’re looking for a way to shift blame. This may be because they’re cheating, but it may also be because they’re dealing with a stressful situation or are depressed.
Monitor Their Behaviour
The way a person behaves will change considerably when they are having an affair. It’s worth monitoring aspects of your partner’s behaviour. Are they batting away compliments and affection? Taking extra care of their appearance, losing weight and putting on aftershave or perfume more? Making excuses for being late? Any of these can be a sign – though they aren’t direct proof.
Talk About Doing Things Differently
If a partner is having an affair they’re less likely to be invested in your relationship. When you have worries that they may be cheating, it is worth suggesting some changes in your relationship. Maybe you want to take more trips as a couple, or romantic nights in. If they’re just feeling unmotivated in the relationship, a change may be exciting for them. If they are cheating, they may look for excuses to avoid putting more time in.
Hire An Investigator
It sounds like a nuclear option, and it is something you should only do if you are prepared for the results. However, a relationship investigator may be the definitive way to put your doubts to rest once and for all. Furtive behaviour may be explained because they’re planning a surprise for you. They may be working on their appearance because they’re chasing a promotion. Or it may be bad news. One way or the other, you’ll know.
It is worth bearing in mind that there are various potential outcomes when you explore whether your partner is unfaithful. You may get the dreaded news that they are, and have to deal with the fallout from that. You may get good news and be able to move forward. Either way, it has to be better than the endless doubts that can assail you when you just don’t know.
Staff Writer; Mariah Freeman