Saturday, June 15, 2024

Thicker Than Blood.

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( “Blood is thicker than water.” Two liquids compete against each other in one sentence.  Each liquid represents a vital necessity to life.  Blood is the mandatory members of your clan that are scientifically bound to you.  Water are your choices for camaraderie and meaningful relationships based on interests and experiences.  We have been taught for years that family supersedes friends no matter the circumstances. As society becomes aware of the increase of child sexual abuse and parental abandonment,  the aforementioned statement is now becoming more of a question.  While I wholeheartedly respect the place of family in the quilt of a whole person,  there are exceptional benefits to having friends that are just as strong a fabric as family.

Farts that sound like they are sad. Drunken nights sleeping near a toilet.  One night stands with that one ugly dude you met in the club. Imagine telling this to family members with certain expectations and standards of the family image.  One of the first benefits to a close friendships is openness.  Friends are willing to accept attributes and quirks that accompany your growth as a human.  These characteristics are new and probably out of the family norm.  For example, my college personality was drastically different from my hometown personality because I felt comfortable with being myself.  In my hometown, I had to live up to certain expectations of my family that were strict and very fake. I was overly caring just to keep up appearances. I had to monitor my thoughts and words very carefully. This also meant that the truth was usually not present.  I said what I thought people wanted to hear. In college,  I was free like a slave finally making it to Canada. I could be sarcastic, laid back, but driven for whatever my heart wanted. My heart wanted friends who could understand my quirks and nuances and not judge me for them.  This is how I became a part of “Da Fam”: a group of people that love each other so much that we think we are family without a single ounce of blood to relate us. This group also made me clearly understand the second reason for strong friend bonds: hard work.

People believed Sam Witwicky was crazy when he said “No Sacrifice, No Victory” at the most inopportune moments of the Transformer movie series, but he was not completely nuts.  He understood that it took effort, pain, and possibly dead Decepticons to get to success.  Creating friendship relationships takes a conscious effort to work hard.  It is not easy to develop a bond with someone who is not related to you and has not known you for a long period of time. So when you choose to develop a friendship, it takes both sides of the relationship.  Both have to make time to get to know the other person. Both have to agree to talk and discuss when both do not like each other. Both have to learn about the others likes, dislikes, and quirks along with remembering them.

Doing all these things are optional with friends.  Doing these things with family is usually a requirement in order for no one to end up on the 6 o’clock news for homicides. Families teach this from the beginning when mothers need to develop a bond with children for survival purposes.  Sisters and brothers may not like each other, but they are usually taught to defend your sibling above anyone else.  When you have the choice to do these things,  you appreciate more and work harder to keep the relationship.

I fully understand that friendships and family relationships have their positives and negatives.  Each can have their emotional impact on you as a person.  Friendships, however, have the power to introduce you to great people; people you are willing to be open with and make sacrifices for.  Blood and water are both vital liquids to living.  Do not make the effort of sacrificing one for the other.

Staff Writer; J. W. Bella

May also follow this talented sister online over at; JWB Writes.

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