Thursday, July 18, 2024

Dear Beautiful Self.

February 17, 2019 by  
Filed under Health & Wellness, News, Opinion, Weekly Columns

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( As women at some point we have all thought about what we deserve, and fought against treatment from friend, loved ones and significant others we didn’t earn. The one person we never hold accountable for treatment is self. Too many of us focus on who will love, adore, admire, exalt, support and defend us.  There are those of us that have written off love because of this and attract partners that never seem to value our worth. Sister, when you look in the mirror what do you see? Do you see beauty, or ugly? That’s an important question because many of us look in the mirror and all we see is the opinions of others be it good or bad.

Often times when the compliment is paid, we are quick to brush it off as someone wanting something or feeding us lies. That’s not a recipe for love, but for self-hatred. As much as we desire love we seem uncapable of loving self, nor the sister standing next to us. The ugly we see in self is the ugly we see in other black women. Black girl magic is wonderful, but words are powerful some of us might be stuck in girl mode while trying to proclaim Queendom. This will never wok because queendom is not merely a title…sisters it’s a lifestyle. Its time to talk to our beautiful selves and mean what we say as much as we mean the negativity we speak. If words are life too many of us are killing ourselves daily with the words we levy against self.

Dear beautiful self should be a daily conversation you have with you. The only way to uproot a negative self-image is to replace it with a positive one. The problem is you must choose to love you. Too many of us have been told that we have no control over how we feel, or how we view self. Maybe that is true as a minor, but a Queen creates her own path. Sister you have to decide you are going to be your biggest cheerleader. It doesn’t matter what your people say or your partner…what you say comes first. Dare to love! Dare to look at yourself in the mirror and say, “Good Morning Beautiful”! don’t wait for a single human being to affirm your beauty, intelligence and power. You must believe in these things first. Everything you desire from others feed it to yourself first. Doing this allows you to know what the love feels like unfiltered.

I’d like to think you don’t want to hurt you…so give it a try. Sisters its okay to want the world to respect you, and our men to adore you. However, what’s the use if you don’t respect nor adore you. Could it be that we are attracting the energy we give? I hear your, your hair is on point, you are educated, your heels are high, and your makeup is flawless. However, do you see yourself as in the manner of your outer appearance? Think about it. There are many people that look like a pillar of good health with more diseases they are battling than you would ever believe.

Every belief system you can partake of has some element of positive affirmation or speaking life into yourself. You can’t afford to put your self image, and self-love in the hands of another individual. This includes parents because some of us have horrific parents that never spoke life into us, and some of us have lost amazing parents of whose words we can no longer hear. Regardless of which situation you have dealt with self-image, and love, is your responsibility. Before you can hold the world accountable for treatment of you…you must hold yourself accountable for the treatment of you.

Below I have shared a short version of my daily affirmation. This has become my habit to pour into me. Before you wonder about hardship…I have no biological family left, I battle with illness, and have unspeakable physical scars that I wear as a result of assault. Yes sisters…my face is scared. If I don’t love me, I guarantee you no more else will. Have the courage to affirm and claim yourself.

Dear Beautiful Self,

I am grateful for another day to breathe air among the land of the living. I am powerful, beautiful, intelligent and strong. I chose life in every situation. I’m willing to love well, and I expect the same energy. I love in a Queens state of mind, grace and class. I am richly blessed every day. People are placed in my path that teach me about life and living, and to show me God’s love that is in me. My joy and strength is a blessing and peace to those I meet. Today is a good day because God made it, and I will it. No matter what happens today I choose love, joy, peace and happiness because these are the areas I can control.  Rock on because you are one BADDD Sister!!!

Staff Writer; Christian Starr

May connect with this sister over at Facebook and also Twitter

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