(ThySistas.com) Being a stay at home mother is the most difficult job a woman can hold. Often doing the work of a nutritionist, doctor, therapist, maid, secretary, teacher, etc., for free. There are subtle rewards when you’ve had a long day and you look into your little one’s eyes and get an instantaneous boost of energy and feel overwhelmed with love. So much so that you might squeeze them a little bit harder than you should have. The reward of knowing where your child is and knowing that they are being taken care of. That no matter what they will love you, no conditions. Even when they get mad when you tell them no.
The beauties of being a stay at home mom do not take away the times where you haven’t had any real sleep in days, because you and one or all of your children are sick and somehow you’re the only one with the know how to make things better.
Here are a few tips to help make the days a little easier and the nights feel longer.
Change your Perspective
Often times you just feel overwhelmed, trapped, or if we’re just being honest, taken advantage of,but the truth of the matter is that you get to do this. You have to be open to shifting your thoughts to ones that are serving you. Think of all of the women who have to send their little ones off to school or daycare because they can’t stay
home and then something ends up happening to their child. Think of the fact that there are still a lot of women that desperately would like a child and has not been able to have one, naturally or otherwise. You have been placed in a unique situation where you can be at home with your child, raise them according to your family values, and not miss any of those important milestones.
So when your child is tap dancing on the last nerve that you’ve been able to keep secured remember “I get to do this.” Just that slight shift in how you think of your situation can do wonders, especially during those times where you feel so out of it you actually start considering care for your child outside of your home, in order to get a break.
Self Care: It’s Okay to be Selfish
The word selfish has gotten a bad rap because people often are focusing on self at the most inappropriate times. We aren’t talking about that here. Be selfish in the sense that you have to take care of you first. For instance, as a woman sometimes if you don’t eat you become impatient, intolerant, and easily angered. It’s okay to feed yourself before your little one, although this might require that you get up a little earlier, it’s worth your peace. This will give you the energy you need and the patience you require to deal with your hungry child that hasn’t quite grasped the concept of food having to be cooked and not ready on demand.
Self care increases your patience and allows you to be more effective in your parenting. You have to be intentional about your self care. Sometimes as a mom you get about 3-4 days out of the week to shower. Even if it’s for five minutes before the little one comes to interrupt, get in the shower with the intention of relaxing and enjoying your time. If that means candles, essential oils, scrubs, etc., enjoy every second of it knowing that it could potentially be interrupted, but appreciating that you get to treat yourself. You would be surprised at how much better your morning will be just by washing your face. It’s refreshing and it officially wakes you up and wipes away the sleep from last night. When you look good, you feel good. Get to those skin goals.
Accept Help
Often times, when being a stay at home mom you don’t really get any help. It’s often assumed that you got it, you aren’t working, or it’s a piece of cake. Sometimes it’s not assumed at all, no one just wants to help. Be open to all help that comes your way. Don’t put your child in the hands of someone that you don’t trust, however, don’t allow your fear of being away from your child keep you hostage.
Accepting all help includes allowing your oldest child, if you have multiples, to help out. Sometimes because of the way you feel your mother misused you as a child you don’t want allow your child to help, to keep them from feeling those same feelings of resentment. However, if they want to help, let them and don’t be upset with them if they don’t want to help at a certain time. Give yourself that small break.
You are the mother of civilization. Every man and woman comes through the womb of a woman. Be an example for your children but also take care of yourself. These tips will allow you to release most of the stress that comes with the day to day life of being a stay at home mom.
Staff Writer; Sister Victoria X
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