(ThySistas.com) We live in a time by which we are to be accountable for nothing. It is easier to talk about our feelings as a result of a situation, or choice, verse owning the matter. It is quite okay to admit you embarked upon an unplanned path. It is human to admit that motherhood is hard and being a single mother without assistance compounds the difficulty. No one will ever say mothers should not tell the truth about times whereby they are weary or wonder how they are going to make it. All of us experience those times where single mothers unassisted, single mothers co-parenting, or mothers that are married.
Many of us regardless of status have locked ourselves in the bathroom at some point and cried wondering how we were going to make it though the day. Many of us have had children unexpectedly, and yes that includes married woman as married doesn’t always equal support, and had to put our dreams on hold for our children until we could get a handle on motherhood.
For many of us our salvation just might come when we look in the eyes of a child that loves us and smiles, when we see the peace on that child’s face as they sleep. Many of us would not trade those moments for the world. We know that if we willingly have sex pregnancy could be a consequence of that action regardless of contraception. If that is not something we can live with we must re-evaluate our actions. I say that because the child that comes into this world as a result of our choice to willingly engage in sexual activity deserves to be loved by their mother. That child didn’t ask to be here…we made a choice that produced that child. We have to be accountable to that baby.
There is no road map for motherhood. It is one of the ultimate adjustments, and is can grow you up quickly. If you were in your early 20’s living free…it can cut that short and cause you to mature faster than you may have wanted to while limiting your “fun”. All of these things are definitively growing pains but not grounds to question how we would love an unplanned child that was the product of a choice to engage in sexual activity.
This idea is disturbing because in the world of “Live your Truth”, “Speak You Truth”, and feeling matter above reason often times these positions if not careful can become a way to shake accountability for the choices we willingly make. When our choices are taken it very understandable that one may grapple with the idea of how to love when violation has occurred. However, when we choose we must ask ourselves how selfish we must be to wonder how to love a child that was a product of choice. How to care for, cope with, adjust to, and provide for the unplanned baby is very understandable…but why is love a thought.
If we numb ourselves to accountability selfish thoughts can take us. Sometimes we can shake back…but sometimes this line of thought can cause a child that deserves love to be denied such because their existence interrupted a particular kind of freedom. If this can happen its important that we weight the potential consequences of choosing to lay down. Even though its hard, and sometimes unplanned, being mother is still a gift
Staff Writer; Christian Starr
May connect with this sister over at Facebook; https://www.facebook.com/christian.pierre.9809 and also Twitter; http://twitter.com/MrzZeta.