(ThySistas.com) We hear men say that certain kinds of women can’t be turned into housewives…well certain kinds of men can’t be turned into husbands. Unfortunately, there are sisters out here staking their everything on someone that isn’t as invested. What makes this troublesome is the brother has showed you that you are merely an option. It is very important that, as women, we allow ourselves the time to heal from past pain. We must begin to strengthen ourselves in terms of self-worth and self-understanding. When we know who we are, and value such it will not be easy to accept sub-par treatment from anyone. No amount of need to be held or sexually stimulated should equate to allowing emotional abuse.
Its important that we have real conversations with sisters we trust to be loving to us while telling us the truth. It is highly dangerous to be led by feeling, emotions and sex. Let’s be real many of us know
about that brother that has seemed to master our body like he has advanced degrees. He can take us to euphoric places where all the stress of the world literally oozes out of our pours and he has us higher than a drug. He can make our heart scream as he wields control of our body…and we love it…love him. This is a serious area of confusion, because sometimes we find it hard to separate the magnificent sex from the mans handling of us in a relationship.
If you find that the only area he has mastered is your body you are in trouble…and he isn’t enough. Though the sex may be drug grade great…even addicts realize at some point rehab is necessary. No amount of sex is worth your dignity. Yes, he has his part to play in the inadequacies he brings to the table, but you must re-gain control of yourself mind and body.
When you find yourself begging for time, attention and support in areas that are serious in your life realize you can’t excuse that behavior. If you look up and find that you have a viable support system stop feeling yourself the lie that you are alone. Its’s understandable that you want him to be there for you, but you aren’t alone. You don’t have to tolerate being someone’s side note when you should be the main discussion.
Self worth is determined by you. Giving him all the advantages of a spouse when he is not your husband might have him spoiled to think you will always be there. In this you must realize it might be time to let go. Evaluate yourself, honestly, in the situation as we all have things to work on which means no you aren’t perfect. However, no one deserves abuse, to be ignored, nor to simply be an outlet for sex. If you see that this is the defining points of your relationship…it’s time to go.
Staff Writer; Chelle’ St James
May also connect with this sister via Twitter; ChelleStJames.