Tuesday, September 29, 2020


Give the Mercy You Expect.

January 17, 2020 by  
Filed under Health & Wellness, News, Opinion, Weekly Columns

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(ThySistas.com) When you have been hurt by the actions of others it is very easy to begin to see interactions with others as a laundry list of things you don’t deserve. Hurt can have you feeling alone, abandoned, and seeking validation based on the behaviors and positions of others. This is a vulnerable space in which to exist. You know people are not perfect, but when your emotional backpack is full perfection is what you will subconsciously come to expect. This can cause you to assume the behavior of others in an attempt to protect yourself from hurt that can come based on the hurt you’ve endured. Thing is sistah everyone has experienced hurt and no one can achieve the standard of perfection. Mistakes, quarrels, and accidents can happy…you have to try to be in the present as much as possible. As we get ready to go into another year consider taking the back filled with past hurt and dumping it in exchange for healing. Taking the time to walk in healing will allow you to see people for who they are and avoid you from putting negativity into the universe that will eventually come back to you.

In knowing everything you have been through in life you know you are not perfect. If you have endured trauma you know that different events can trigger your past situations. When you are working on healing you can admit sometimes you might not say things correctly, you may mistake certain behavior, and there are times when you feel down and you’d hate someone to think its because of them. In this you have to ask those that love you for grace and mercy when dealing with you. As you do your best to navigate life as you are you are grateful for people that see the real you past the hurt. You cherish the people in your circle that stand with you no matter what you face. It is comforting to know you are not expected to get everything right…they know your heart and keep in mind your intention when days are rough.

The care you receive from your circle is the care you have to give. No one is asking you to accept subpar treatment from anyone. With that being said be careful how harshly you judge others when they are having a bad day. There are people in your life who have been through trauma and they need grace and mercy on some days just as you do. Just because they don’t know that you are hurting like them, or a work in progress, doesn’t give you the right to hold them to a standard you yourself can’t keep. The hypocrisy of this moment is important because the energy we put out is what we receive. The care you give will make its way back to you…the same applies to a lack of care. It is important to realize everyone is not out to hurt you just as this is not your intention.

Walk into this new year determined to be your best person and let your healing shine through. This doesn’t mean you are expected to be perfect. This means you recognize you are a work in progress and so are other people. You don’t want to be assumed and judged based off the behavior of others, so don’t sow that energy. As you heal look more towards reciprocity this coming year as it will help you establish balance within yourself and with others.

Staff Writer; Chelle’ St James

May also connect with this sister via Twitter; ChelleStJames.


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