(ThySistas.com) Why is it that the wonder, and curiosity of some white women take seem to take precedence over the rights of others? Before anyone gets up in arms we know all white women do not feel the need to reach out and touch others as if they were an exhibit, however too many feel it’s there right. Black women have had to say don’t touch my hair more than they ever should. We are not exotic animals, and none of us are on an auction block to be inspected…and we never should have been in the first place. This foolishness causes anxiety in some black women because they feel it is a violation of their body and personal space to be touched by anyone without giving permission. Now, if a man were to touch us without permission all women, white women included, would say that behavior is wrong, and that man is out of line. Some would say the man assaulted us by touching without consent.
The problem is white women must come to understand that they do not have this right either. If they touch without consent how is that now assault? Oh, its not because white society, the ruling class in this country, says that the rules don’t apply to them. The underlining problem is the lack of acknowledgement of our humanity. This isn’t a petty issue it’s a matter of violation and its time white women understand and teach it to their sisters…black women are not to be touched at will.
I am currently 27 weeks pregnant, and I have natural hair. This may not seem like anything out of the ordinary, however it both tend to make my encounters with some white women very uncomfortable. The sisters I work around ask me how I’m feeling, or how is the baby. A couple have asked to touch my belly or ask me about the baby’s movement. These encounters make me feel my wellbeing is genuinely inquired about, and I am able to say yes or no to having hands on me. We discuss hair from time to time, and if we are trying to explain something “feel right here” might be extended in said hair discussion. The thing is all of the interaction is welcomed and consensual.
The sisters I see don’t get offended when the answer to touching my belly is no…they don’t have an attitude at all. However white women approach me speak, tell me I’m glowing and extend their hands to touch my belly as if they have a right to do so. This is awkward and angering. The first thing that comes to mind is lady I’m not a pet or an exhibit. This is my body you don’t have rights to it on any level. When asked not to touch me they turn red and get offended as if I have wounded or disrespected them because they couldn’t feely do as they please with something that doesn’t belong to them. Oh, well they have to get over it.
Why some white women feel they can touch us at will is simple…to them we don’t belong to ourselves. That may sound silly, but we live in a society that perpetuates and supports the entitled nature of these women. How can we ever stand in any movement together as women when I am not acknowledged as a woman with rights to my own body and space? Why should we as black women have to say don’t touch my hair, don’t touch my body, don’t touch my children.
We do not belong to white women nor white people. It is important to remember these offenses and why they happen we are urged to all stand together as women and protest. I am reminded to some of them I’m supporting their agenda, not our agenda. Black women may have to continually remind white women, in this regard, to stay in their lane which is to respect our person. It’s humiliating in ways they could never understand. I’m not a pet…not an animal plainly put do not touch me.
Staff Writer; Christian Starr
May connect with this sister over at Facebook; https://www.facebook.com/christian.pierre.9809 and also Twitter; http://twitter.com/MrzZeta.