(ThySistas.com) There are sisters, not all, that desire to be wives. They don’t want to spend their life in what they understand to be “alone”. For some that avoid the idea of marriage at all costs it can be rooted in the belief that a wife is a weak position. Many of us have known women who lost sight of their dreams, their joy, or their sense of self inside unhealthy marriages. It’s not hard to assume the wife to be the weak person in the house because to an outsider it seems she has to juggle everything while still finding herself under the demands of her husband. As much as some would glorify marriage when we turn on the TV or check out social media, more often than not, marriage doesn’t look appealing due to the pain and drama.
Furthermore, some wives’ groups that encourage marriage, biblically, tend to focus on being quiet and agreeable to your husband while just letting God fix the rest. Talking to some women it seems like the biggest child they have to cater to is indeed their husband…that’s not what we agreed to in saying “I do”. If one didn’t know for themselves marriage doesn’t look too appealing.
It is very important to be grounded in who you are as a woman and settled on what you need in a partner. Granted no man is perfect, and guess what, neither are you. With that being said you need to know what you cannot live with, and why. If nothing else this will show you how to spot Mr. Wrong. It’s not that the wife position is weak, however it is greatly misunderstood. Too many women enter into marriage with unrealistic expectations, they don’t know themselves, and some are using marriage to escape loneliness, abandonment or their parents.
We can also have a jaded perspective of what a wife is from listening to the stories of women that are miserable in their marriages or get run over by their spouse. It’s important to understand the life someone is living is not yours. The experiences of another don’t determine what your experience will be. It’s important to know your understanding of marriage, and why you are choosing that path. Know that if you decide marriage is not for you let it be because you don’t want it…not because of the opinions of others or a lack of understanding of what a wife truly is.
Know that a wife can carry wisdom in a house; her very nature can help shift a house to a home. If someone is looking at a wife biblically often times all they see is “submit”. They are unaware of passages in the book of Proverbs where wisdom is personified with feminine language. The very favor of God comes with a wife, and Proverbs 31 shows a virtuous woman whose husband is known in his community. Knowing who you are and the power you possess in the very command of your presence is necessary to be a wife.
The position of a wife is not one of weakness but of power, wisdom, grace, love, strength and sacrifice. You are not less than a man, and you are not his mother. Who you marry will greatly affect your experience…which goes back to knowing yourself. Do your own homework on wife life, and know some of us are happy, strong, educated, good mothers, loved, cherished, and have husbands that truly adore us. Every marriage has challenges because life is challenging, but it doesn’t make you weak. You can be a wife, and be yourself if that is the path you choose.
Staff Writer; Christian Starr
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