(ThySistas.com) The strength of the village is tired. The sistahs that seem to find a way to navigate life for themselves while having to answer others are tired. These sistahs deserve reciprocity and truth be told they need it. They are the reason the village is safe, yet they have no safe space within it. The very people that claim to love them are very disregarding concerning them. Your pillars of strength do not receive the same manifestation of love, support, empathy, and care. Some of your mountains of strength are crying inside with nowhere to turn. They have no one to truly hear their words, wipe their tears, and tell them everything will be okay. These women are expected to show up…they are your heir apparent matriarchs and nurturers yet they are alone.
The strong sistahs of the village, of the family, need safe spaces. They need spaces whereby they can lay their burdens down and merely exist, knowing they are covered. We can’t call out the “Strong Black Woman” concept if we are apart of why the ideal exist. The sad part is, the women we know can shoulder the village are left to do so without support, and yet they are questioned about what they become.
Strong women need safe spaces among their sistahs whereby they can be vulnerable without fear or anxiety. They need to know it’s okay for them to say not today, to rest, to partake of self-care, to establish boundaries, and to accept that they can’t answer everyone. This is very important is we don’t want to start losing the strong one’s that hold us up. There has to come a point whereby we know that we don’t offer safety to our pillars.
The same people yelling they don’t want to hear no complaining o negativity from anyone because they are protecting their peace will call the strong sistah in their life and unburden every complaint and negative vibe they have knowing she will be there for them. They know she’s not going to give them a taste of their own medicine. They know she will not only listen but help them figure out a course of action, and do the spiritual work to help hem get through a rough patch. They know they can call their pillar and vent until there heart is content about work and family. However, their pillar knows she is not safe to do the same. She knows she will be met with disregard, or the silence of disinterest. Neither of these responses is okay, and they ten to remove a safe space.
Let’s love on our strong sistahs. We must create the space to let them know they are appreciated, and they are not alone. They must receive the care that we ourselves demand. Our pillars need to know we see them, and we care about the issues that concern them. They must know we are willing to listen, and show up for them. They must understand that their care is important to us…and we’ll help create the safe space. The only way we vanquish the negative Strong Black Woman ideal is to work together in sisterhood. We must remember to give our pillars of strength the same love, compassion, empathy, and time they give us. The truth is they need it to survive and thrive.
Staff Writer; Christian Starr
May connect with this sister over at Facebook; https://www.facebook.com/christian.pierre.9809 and also Twitter; http://twitter.com/MrzZeta.