(ThySistas.com) When we think about a woman being called fast, or promiscuous the mind tends to lean towards sexism. It would be the way we are raised in terms of moral compass and religion…but when the standard is not applied equally to all we know sexism is afoot. Men framing women in this light is wrong, and unacceptable. If they have been wronged by a woman, they are in relationship with they need to address that woman, not label all women. This is a conversation to be had, but on another day. Today we are centering on sistahs doing this to each other, and that seems to be a harder conversation to have. It’s easier to address the wrong doing of another than it is to address self. We see this every day, as some of us will quickly call out toxic masculinity, but we are unwilling to understand [or acknowledge] the detriment of toxic femininity. Yes, both can exist. Yes, both need to be addressed, and both are wrong. I say all of this to say, it’s time to deal with the Jezebel narrative amongst each other.
If we are honest, we grew up being called fast by women also…and some of us became those women while trying to damn the use of the term by others. It is very off putting to hear the “Jezebel Spirit” narrative misused in church by woman towards women they deem worthy of an attack. The sad part is many of us have a Bible and if we simply took the time to read, we’d understand who Jezebel was, the real threat she posed, and why we are wrong to relate her to sexual promiscuity. Honestly, I’m not sure where it started, but I promise you it means there is willful ignorance, and/or deliberate manipulation of the congregation. What’s for certain is we need to stop harming one another with this false narrative.
We know that when some attend church the word of the Pastor, and other Elders of the church become bible. I am willing to bet this is one of the ways the false narrative of Jezebel was allowed to stay alive. Sistahs, it is important to read our Bible for ourselves and make sure that what we are hearing in service, and what we are reading line up. I could write a whole serious on that issue alone, but back to Jezebel. If one reads their Bible, they will find that Jezebel was well taught, well mannered, and raised to be a Queen. Nothing about her was common, she was beautiful, and highly intelligent. Her sin was not that she was “fast”, it was idolatry, gross spiritual manipulation of her husband, she was willing to see others killed for what she manipulated him to want, and she had no respect for God nor his ministers.
Jezebel was ruthless in many ways, and her cunningness is something that she chooses to use to assist in her evil; if she was of a different spirit, it could have as easily been used for good [look up Queen Ester]. It is important to have conversations about who Jezebel truly was because she was the kind of person that could destroy a community, and she has the intelligence to do so. This is very different from someone who is just “fast” and has no control over their womanly urges per se, or a woman dealing in manipulation through sex. When we call each other Jezebel we are giving an insult greater than we understand. We are attacking the very nature of the woman we are speaking to…we have called her evil to her face and that is damaging.
Many things contribute to sexual promiscuity and in so many cases there is an underlying long-term trauma that has not been dealt with. Too many of us know this because we have either battled the trauma or know someone who has. Being bullied in community and in church because you can’t control your body or are using your body as self-harm unconsciously is adding to the trauma. This is not what sisterhood, community, family, now church is supposed to be about. We can not just address men, while being hypocrites in the harm of women. Let’s stop speaking Jezebel grade evil on each other…too many don’t know what they are saying. However, we know it’s nothing nice. Please remember there are woman that aim to destroy just as Jezebel once did…with we can’t properly identify the characteristics of that spirit we cannot protect ourselves and loved one’s against it. Jezebel was not fast…she was lethal. Let’s stop incorrectly labeling her on sistahs that are already hurting. They need love, not more pain.
Staff Writer; Chelle’ St James
May also connect with this sister via Twitter; ChelleStJames.