(ThySistas.com) On Sunday mornings, the churches are filled with black women. We are considered the backbone of the church. We put energy into church attendance as apart of spiritual priority, and even out of tradition, and we bring our children. We must be mindful that our church is meeting our spiritual needs and that of our community. We should hold our spiritual leaders accountable, and be mindful of how they present themselves as our children are watching. It is not wise to be so devoted to any congregation that we ignore the red flags that should warn us to consider our membership. Often times we see the writing on the fall but feel obligated to stay in that particular church; doing this causes us to experience church hurt and it could scar out kids. It is important that we are not taken advantage of, nor taken for granted as members.
Sisters should you find yourself in a church whereby there are NO 
MEN, or a handful, please know this is a huge red flag. There is a problem when men in number are not following the male leadership in the church. If you are married and your husband wants to attend church, but doesn’t respect the leadership talk to him about why. It sends a skewed message to our boys that men don’t come to church, hence they themselves may find themselves disengaged. There are numerous reasons as to why men are missing in the church, and most of it is not for a lack of interest. This is not a red flag that should be ignored.
It is not healthy to sit in a church whereby women are the cause to all the ills in the world. If you find yourself sitting in the pew Sunday after Sunday and the sins of women are constantly addressed while the male minister won’t dare address the men in his congregation there is a problem. It might be wise to remove yourself. There are some ministers out there that make it their sole purpose to preach different variations summons on: The sins of Eve, Jezebel, and the whore of Babylon. Yet, the sins of Adam, Moses, Saul, David, and many others go unmentioned. When it’s a constant something is wrong.
Should you find yourself sitting in church being scolded every Sunday by a minister that sounds more like a street thug than a Man of God…red flag. We all come from a past, and God can use our past to minister to others, but he will never have us behave out of character to reach someone. When your pastor treats his congregation as though he can speak to them any kind of way because he’s anointed it’s time to go. Often times there are severe pride issues and these leaders cannot be questioned nor confronted in any fashion. If leaders can’t handle truth or being told something is wrong that is a red flag.
Lastly, church is not something that is meant to be confined to a building. We should be getting out into the community helping to meet the needs of the people. When there is no plan for outreach…that might also be a red flag. There is too much suffering going on within our community for the houses of faith to not show themselves.
Spiritual fortitude is a blessing, and church can be also. Just be sure you are in a place that will meet your needs, allow you to use your talents and bless your life. Disregarding red flags in your house of worship can have serious consequences for you as an individual, and for your family. Don’t let tradition cause bondage in your life.
Staff Writer; Christian Starr
May connect with this sister over at Facebook; https://www.facebook.com/christian.pierre.9809 and also Twitter; http://twitter.com/MrzZeta.