(ThySistas.com) No one deserves more support and respect than the single mothers in our communities. Raising a child single-handedly is one of the most challenging, yet most rewarding things we can experience. However at times it can feel overwhelming and lonely. We’ve been there and we understand you. So here are our top tips for how to cope in those moments where it can all feel a little too much and we need to get back to our normal, happy selves.
Set Up a Support Network
All parents need help from time to time, but having to deal with every single need and demand of your children by yourself definitely calls for a sturdy network of support. Making sure you surround yourself with reliable, loyal and caring friends and family will help you feel that you are supported and have help at hand when you need it.
Reaching out to people you trust to babysit from time to time is important in order for you to spend some much deserved quality time to do what you want to do. We all know it can be tempting to want to do everything on your own but you can’t be superwoman every day so don’t be afraid to reach out and receive help from time to time.
Single-parent support groups are also a great way to get to know other single moms in your area. Not only is it great to chat with people who can understand us but building up a community of like-minded people means you can help support each other as and when necessary.
Running Like Clockwork
Trying to stick to a daily routine with your children and yourself is a great way to keep you organised and on top of things. Scheduling daily chores, bedtimes, breakfast times and other day to day activities at regular times helps you and your children know what to expect on a day by day basis. Clear and consistent routine actually help children feel safe and secure and will help you to feel more organised and in control of the daily list of ‘to-do’s.
Invest in a Reliable Set of Wheels
There is nothing more frustrating or downright infuriating than a car that is constantly letting you down. You have enough on your plate already without having to worry that your car is not going to get you from A to B, or is just too old to be comfortable enough transporting your family around on a day to day basis. Making sure your vehicle is reliable and sturdy is one of the most important investments you can make so make you put in some research to what are the most family friendly vehicles on the market.
If you’re worried about the expense of a new car, there are many options available depending on your situation and individual needs. Check out https://www.approvenow.com/bad-credit-auto-loan/ to research through the financial help available to you.
Discipline Guidelines
Children need guidelines and disciplinary structure in their lives. In fact children actually thrive in environments where they know that certain behaviour is expected from them and which rules need to be adhered to. So think about the values and behaviour that you want to encourage in your children and think about how you can best go about achieving them. If you share custody of the children make sure you work together with your ex-husband or partner planning through the different methods of discipline you want to introduce and then stick to.
Stay Open with Your Kids
Kids are always going to have questions about your changing family dynamic, so be mindful about being open to discussing things honestly with them in a way that will make them feel secure and loved. If your children are at different ages then perhaps individual conversations may be necessary to ensure each child is being talked to in an age-appropriate manner.
Have Fun
Of course this is our favourite tip on this list but is surprisingly one of the first on the list to suffer when the daily demands of life as single mum become overwhelming. Sometimes we can forget to just have fun and enjoy our time with our children at this amazing time of watching them grow up. Just simply downing tools from time to time and saying ‘screw the dishes’, we can remind our children and ourselves that the most important thing of all is that we feel loved, happy and safe together.
You Time
All single moms need time to themselves to unwind, pamper and recharge the batteries. The simplest pleasures in life are usually the best so take yourself for a walk or go for a coffee and read a book for 30 minutes. Find a place in your home that you can truly call your own and find ways that you can unwind and indulge yourself when the kids are in bed. Running a hot bath with a nice glass of red or watching your favourite movie with a bar of your favourite choccie are all simple ways that you can feel content and happy.
Positivity
Feeling overwhelmed by the day to day demands of being a mom happens to the best of us. Add to that the pain of a recent divorce or perhaps the passing of a spouse and the emotions can sometimes get the better of us. Understandably so. It is for this reason that we need to be there for one another to support and care for one another to keep each other buoyant and present.
When we can support and care for each other we can ensure that we are staying positive and not let our sadness or feelings of being overwhelmed get the better of us. As children are incredibly susceptible to our moods we owe it to them to be as positive as we can for their sakes and our own.
Think of ways that you can push yourself to feel more positive on those days that you need a little help. Try some light exercise, look at your diet and make sure that you are looking after yourself with a healthy and balanced diet. Sleep well and try and get as many hours of quality sleep as possible to help you conquer the challenges of the next day with energy, positivity and enthusiasm.
Staff Writer; Latasha Long